Help Like Jesus: Part 29

I sat downstairs in the computer room, channeling. When I looked at my body, it was the same. No weight loss. My guides told me to drink more juice. Always drink juice, it helps with your brain's ability to think clearly. As we channeled, I kept thinking about that girl Melvin used to have a crush on in the 8th grade, Alicia. I wondered about her. I kept bringing her up in my mind. My guides suggested I just call out to her, she might be calling out to me and it's not getting through.

I called out to her. I asked her how she was. She asked me what I was doing. I told her to go ahead and have a look. Subconsciously, very deep subconsciously, people have the ability to peer into one another's lives and stuff. She looked at everything. The channeling, the spells, the energy work. And she said to me: “Woah! Woah! Woah! You are one lucky girl! Please, do not hesitate to find me when you are famous and be my friend! I like you a lot, I knew you not at all in the 8th grade I had no opinion of you. Wow! You are doing fantastic! I wish this were me! Please, let something like this happen to me! I am jealous! All I have to say is, HAVE FUN!”

I was taken aback. I liked this, sure. It was okay. It had never occurred to me, however, that all this was supposed to be fun! I didn't think of that! Wow!

This was one of the most poignant conversations I had on the spiritual plane during this time.

Time to do some energy work on Chance. We need him to talk to you soon. So what we are going to do is, cut his crush cords.

What do you mean, cut his crush cords?

When you have a crush on someone, you attach a specific cord to them, called a crush cord. When you remove it, you no longer have those butterfly feelings for them anymore.

Okay, let's do it!

We went through and removed all his crush cords. There were millions and millions of crush cords. We took a short cut. Cut all his cords to girls. That worked, but not for all of them. Cut all his cords to girls that he likes again. Not really. More crush cords.

The thing about Melvin is, when he sees a girl he thinks is attractive, he automatically attaches a crush cord. Don't worry, we won't remove the one to you!

We went through, and there were so many crush cords. I started laughing when I remembered a status he had when he first visited Spain, and how hot all those girls were! I thought, all those hot girls he saw, those are the crush cords I am removing.

It took several days to remove all the crush cords, and we still didn't get all of them, just the major ones. When we were done, my guides told me something important.

He has a girl in his life now. He is interested in a girl he knows. They are a terrible match. When you removed the crush cord, they moved farther apart on the spiritual plane, and you and him closer together. He also attached another cord to her. A stupid cord.

I thought this was hilarious.

Okay, so first, stretch them out even farther on the spiritual plane. They can be even farther apart. Now, let's add some cords!

First, a cord of disgust. Imagine him, imagine her, now puke, dogs, barf! There you go! You attached a cord of disgust!

Now, let's add another cord. A sociopath cord. What is a sociopath to you?

I don't know, Hitler?

Okay, let's try that. Imagine him, imagine her, now... Hitler! Oops, you added the wrong cord. Instead of a sociopath cord, you added a cord of interest in dark matters. Who else is a sociopath to you?

I thought, Nick, the guy who I thought was the one ugly soul in all the universe.

Okay, now, him, her, Nick! Okay, you added the correct cord! One more cord. What cord do you think we should add?

How about, a mother cord. He thinks of her like a mother.

Now, that's bad practice. We can't add those kinds of cords.

What about, he thinks of her as his daughter?

We can do that one. Okay, imagine her, imagine him, now, sssonnn....

Okay! You attached the cord! Now, we can't guarantee that these cords will grow. But we can hope!

Chapter

I was sitting on the bed, looking at a picture of Melvin when my spirit guides suggested to me, send him energy.

I sent him some energy, not from my heart chakra, but from a chakra a little bit below it.

What the fuck?

Hi.

Have you been thinking about me?

Yeah, a little bit, occasionally.

Are you telling the truth?

Ahh, no.

More than occasionally?

Yeah.

Do you like me?

Yeah, more than a little bit.

Do you like that other girl?

Yeah.... Ahh, no.

What do you think about her?

I like her but... she's mean.

What do you like about her?

Her boobs.

What else do you think about her?

She's gross.

Would you like my body? (I send him a sketch of my body, mentally)

Yeah... I don't like this.. I put my hand on my stomach.

I send him another sketch, without my stomach sticking out.

Yeah, I like that. But it would be better if it were bigger somewhere.. not the boobs, not the butt..

I start groping myself, trying to find out where he means. I try the butt. No. The legs. No. All around the legs. No. My stomach. No. Slightly higher on my stomach. No. I grope all around until my hand lands on my right boob. Here it is. This is where it should be bigger.

He loses energy and the connection breaks.

Chapter

Where did the fun happen in Rachel's house? It was hard to understand how I enjoyed life anymore, I was so bored all the time.

You need to just chew a full piece of gum every time. You enjoy it more when you chew a full piece. And it's the only thing you enjoy anymore, said my grandma on the other side.

It didn't occur to me that she was joking. I enjoyed channeling quite a bit. But with the chemical imbalance in my brain caused by long term Adderall use, it was hard to enjoy anything.

We went downstairs, to watch television. I watched Twilight. I watched it with commentary. Not commentary from the producers, commentary from the spirit guides. They informed me of all the spirit humor in the movie, and told me what they thought about different parts of the movie. In the spirit world, they hate that movie. It's a dumbfuck movie.

Well, that was a good movie. Now, let's do some house cleaning! Right there, that's a mental illness book. Put away all the mental illness books.

I did so, collected them and put them in the cabinet. Out of sight, out of mind.

Now, walk over here. There's something over here we want you to get rid of.

I walked over to the cabinet above the desk. On the cabinet, there was a list of Innercept numbers.

Throw that away.

I did so.

Spirits keep interrupting my connection with my spirit guides. I felt frazzled and drained, and I started to come down. I know where I am, I know what I am doing. But I don't know if my spirit guides are really real. Are they just in my head? Is this experience, all this supernatural stuff, just imaginary?

I sat down and started talking to someone new.

Are you Marissa?

No.

Are you Meg?

No.

Are you one of my spirit guides?

No.

Are you my guardian angel?

No.

Are you an angel?

No.

Are you something like an angel?

No.

Are you the spirit of someone I knew?

No, but you know me very well.

Are you my mom? Dad? Cat?

No.

Are you me?

In a way. I am your fears.

What are you saying to me?

I know you very well. But I don't believe in you.

You don't believe in me?

I don't believe you exist.

Every time I started doubting my experiences, this would happen. I would start to believe that I didn't exist.