So I go about my every day routine, and I am plagued again by these awful bouts of pain at the hands of those who know me best. Does it end? Does it get better? The answer is yes.
Is the answer yes? No, we don't know, Rachel. Work on your mind work now.
So I get off work after suffering the whole time, and I have to break attachments. Some to the cord people I will never be friends with. One to thinking this thing in my life is egotistical. One to an old friend I met downtown. One to an attractive body. One to something else that was very important to me for a long time but they recently told me wasn't happening.
When will it end? Will they continue to harass me? Will the bothersome work problem ever cease? No one's harassing me at work, in terms of fellow employees. But the higher power harasses me and tries to get me to fall hard on my face! Or do they? They do it just enough so I can still work.
When will it end is a rhetorical question. I have no idea though. I believe this makes way for a diminished ego, diminishing the ego to the point that makes way for enlightenment. Is it so? Yes! But how soon? How many times do I have to suffer before I wittle the ego down to where I want it to be?
After all, this intense suffering is only temporary, and I know that. If I didn't know that, I couldn't go on. But after not understanding the purpose of this suffering, I think I actually do. The purpose is enlightenment.
The purpose is enlightenment.
