I lay in bed at night, awake. I watched the ceiling, while talking to my spirit guides. My body was in turmoil from all the pumping adrenaline. My gut felt like it had exploded. I told my guides I didn't have the courage to go off Adderall. They laughed. Of course you do, snookems! And they told me to go drink some milk and get my mind off the discomfort.
I was sitting there, when something odd happened. I felt a funny pulling feeling in my down below region. It had a magical quality to it.
That's Chance, and one of the sex cords you have to him. He's pulling, which means he wants you. Try sending him some sexual energy.
I rolled around, thrusted my hips a bit, and emitted sexual energy while thinking about him. In my mind, I heard words spoken. “Two can play that game!”
He's sending another cord! My guides informed me.
I felt a funny static feeling down there, and then the cord hit me and entered my vagina.
This is a good one, get it deeper!
I started touching myself very lightly to drive the cord even deeper. I felt our connection at this moment, the connection between Melvin and I, like we were having sex. It ended when there was a release.
You guys just has astral sex. This is a cord that makes you want to have sex with him without being in love. It makes the sex better.
Wait, wait! Chance is sending another cord!
I felt a cord approach. What is this cord?
This is a chastity cord. It makes him think you are chaste.
I did not let this one attach.
Good, he liked that you didn't attach that one. That one was a joke cord.
I was lying there, when I felt another pull.
Oh, look who's pulling now! It's Adam!
I didn't even have to send him any sexual energy. I felt the prickly feeling in my vagina, and then bam! A cord. I drove it deeper. As I did so, I felt the connection between us, as if we were really having sex.
This is a cord that makes you love his genitals.
I lay there, in pain. I moved to the floor, and withered. Then, I felt something odd. Sexual energy, going to my gut, helping the intense discomfort in my abdomen.
It's Chance. He's sending you healing sexual energy.
All night I lay there in a light slumber, tossing and turning a bit, while Melvin's sexual energy healed my gut. When I woke up the next morning, I went to the gym with my mom. I did a bit of tai chi to heal my energy, because it really needed it, then I sat down and looked at my iPhone to do some picture reading. My guides informed me that picture reading in this state is more accurate when out in public, because of the unfamiliar energy. I looked at Melvin's picture. I was in his aura very, very strongly.
He had a sexual dream last night, with you and him. It was a wet dream. He woke up in a puddle of semen, my guides told me.
I had a problem when I went out in public now. I needed to stay at home or else I started to feel lost, and question all these new beliefs I had. If I stayed out too long, I wondered if I was delusional, if I was just imagining all this, and it made me depressed as all hell.
Okay, time for food. Eat some celery! My guides told me. It was late at night.
I went to the kitchen and got out some celery and started chomping. When I was done, my guides informed me of something.
You're a white light. Spirits come to you to help cross over. They will come to you around this time. It usually starts in late adolescence, but yours was dimmed by the heavy Adderall usage. They did, but not as many as would have come. Now, you will be swarmed by spirits.
Oh, boy! This freaked me out quite a bit. I was lying on my bed.
To help them cross over, send them a little bit of energy, and use the same procedure as you did to help Caitlin's friend. By the way, Caitlin's friend had already crossed over, you didn't help him. We just did that to teach you about helping spirits cross over.
So, for the one right next to you... Look up, go into the light!
The one right above you... Look up, go into the light!
The one in the corner... Look up, go into the light!
The one around you... Look up, go into the light!
It freaked me out like no other to think that there were so many spirits around me.
You don't really need to say go into the light, they do that automatically, but since you are used to it, you can...
You are rescuing these spirits from a horrible existence. Not hell, exactly... They were not in pain, exactly. Just horribly, horribly bored. For a very, very long time. Ghostly life is very, very boring. Some of these spirits you are crossing over have been wandering the Earth, looking for help for hundreds of years. Time goes slower, when you are a ghost too. Imagine being bored, doing nothing at all for thousands of years.
Why don't they cross over?
Sometimes, they lose touch with their guides while they are dying. Sometimes, their guides decide they don't want to help cross them over and abandon them. Sometimes, they don't even have guides. Some inexperienced souls come to Earth, without understanding that it is absolutely essential to have guides, for the main reason that you will not cross over without guides.
Someone you know will not cross over when she dies. A girl you were friends with in 5th grade who you hated and who hated you. She does not have guides who like her, and is a bad soul. She will not cross over. Some other people you know may not cross over either.
They proceeded to go over a few people I knew who may not cross over.
Now, you need some juice. Go get some.
I went to the kitchen, and as I was drinking, I felt a claw scrape the back of my neck.
“AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!” I screamed at the top of my lungs.
My parents called out my name. “Rachel! Don't do that! What is it?”
“A ghost! A ghost! A ghost! It touched me!”
That's not a good one. Don't cross that one over.
We're the other ones I crossed over good?
Some were, some weren't. Usually the ones that come at the beginning are good. These are human spirits. Later on, bad ones will come. Don't worry, most of them can't hurt you, and we will protect you against the ones who can.
We looked around the house for my heels. It was time to practice. I was getting ready for a date with Melvin. He was going to ask me out, my guides told me. Women are more attractive when they wear heels. Therefore, I should wear heels.
I found my heels, and got ready to lace up. Put the right one on first, someone told me. Now before you get up, shake your feet a little. Let your feet settle into the heels.
Who are you? I asked.
We are the Heel Luck Gods. We are going to help you learn to walk in heels with grace and precision.
I got up and started walking around.
Careful! Careful! Oh, that's good heel luck! Good heel luck! Excellent heel luck! Good heel luck! Bad heel luck! Bad heel luck! Okay, stop!
I stopped.
You got bad heel luck. Pick up your left foot and blow on the shoe.
I did so. When I did so, I felt the bad heel luck leave my foot.
It continued like this, while the Heel Luck Gods commented on every little move I made, critiquing the quality of the heel luck. I asked them who they were again.
We are the Heel Luck Gods.
Are you really gods?
No, we're not gods, we just call ourselves that to make ourselves feel big.
I chuckled.
We enjoy being laughed at, we are self-deprecating heel luck gods. As long as you don't laugh at heel luck. You should take heel luck very seriously. We are not going to stop you from laughing, but please, it is time for your session!
I continued around the island.
Now, stop!
I stopped.
Walk backwards.
I did so, then stopped, and walked forward again.
Now, make an obstacle course! Move the chairs around the kitchen, and then walk around the chairs! Moving chairs in heels is good heel luck!
I did so. Then I moved the chairs around again, then walked around the new obstacle course.
Now, put the chairs back. Remember, holding onto furniture for support in heels is bad heel luck, unless of course you are preventing a fall, in which case a fall would be far worse heel luck.
When are the heels going to be good to walk in out in public?
Oh no! Oh no! You have a long way to go for that, missy!
What are your ideas about heel luck?
We enjoy heel luck so much, we devoted our lives to it.
How many of you are there?
There is a god for each muscle in the foot.
Really?
No, not really. There's actually only one of us.
Now, you are done for your first session. Take your heels off, left one first. Then, display your heels proudly, so everyone can see them. This is important. If one falls over, it is bad heel luck.
I lay down on the couch downstairs, trying to sleep. I woke up in the morning, and my spirit guides told me something they hadn't told me before.
You are going through puberty again. Adderall suppressed your puberty. Now, you will go through it in full. It is called double puberty. Your sexual interests will change. No more of your awkward stuff. You boobs will grow. Your waist will get narrower. You will get that muscle tone on your body that pubescent girls get. We have to do something to start it up. Do you want us to?
Yeah, of course!
Okay then, that's what we will do. Let's do some energy work on the chakras. Open your sacral chakra.
I found the chakra, which was located below the naval, and opened it wide. It had the dimensions of a curved satellite dish. In my mind, I imagined a funny dish like this that reminded me of an ogre's ear. It gave me a funny feeling.
Is there a word for that, in the spirit world?
Yes there is. It's a feeling we associate with botched energy work. Though, usually we don't associate it with funny dishes, we think of mutated flowers and stuff along those lines.
We talked about masochism. They told me I was a masochist. Do you want to understand how to enjoy it? They asked me.
What? What were they asking?
Let's add a whips and chains cord between you and Chance.
Okay, why not? So we did.
We looked at the picture in my mind of my perfect body. You need less muscle tone, they told me. When you have a perfect body, you are slender, not muscular, slender. That's what most men think of as the perfect body. Forget Britney Spears. She is way too muscular. When you work out, do not work out with weights. Do floor exercises. They sculpt a leaner physique.
When you go to the mall, get your ears pierced! Not right now though. You are in a sensitive state, very sensitive. You are sensitive to physical pain. It will hurt more than normal. We need you to do it when you are feeling better than this.
As I was sitting there, my hand started to move almost of its own accord, and grope my body. First, I groped my breast. Then, I groped my lips, to see how chapped they were. Then I groped my rear end, and then my waist, to see how skinny I was. I smiled, and the energy dissipated.
What was that?
That was Adam. He is interested in you. He wanted to see how you were looking physically.
It kept happening like that, after that. I would be lying on the couch, or lying on my bed, and someone would take ahold of my hand, and start groping my body. Sometimes, it was Adam. Sometimes, it was Melvin. And sometimes, it was Brandon.
After one particularly gruesome groping, I noticed my appetite vanished. I was thrilled.
Chance cast a spell on you, he thought you could stand to lose some weight. He wants you stick thin. It's not a good thing. It will cut your appetite now, but in this state, slow your metabolism in the long run. Do you want us to take it off?
No!
Really? You want a slower metabolism in the long run?
Okay, fine! I said reluctantly.
My guides removed the spell.
We were watching TV, when Erik spoke to me, on the spiritual plane. He said that he had a wonderful time talking to me always, please do not stop. He also told me that his dad was a good guy, don't be mean to him.
I'm not mean to him!
I'm just kidding, weirdo. We know you like him. He's a great guy.
And that was it.
I dreaded night time. Night time was when the ghosts come out. They were irksome as all hell, and scared the crap out of me. They would creep up behind me, touch me, talk to me. One told me he knew my mom was a lesbian. I don't think it knew what those words meant, but that's what it said.
These are bad spirits. Don't cross anymore over. We don't want these spirits, up in heaven. You crossed a bunch of bad spirits over, now they are creating havoc up here in heaven.
So I couldn't cross anymore over. It would take all day, as it was, to cross them all over. Spirits surrounded me during the day, too. One day, I had gotten through a session of energy work, and I was eating yogurt. I spilled a drop on the counter. I asked my guides if I should clean that up.
“No! Don't clean that up! Whatever you do, DON'T CLEAN THAT UP!” I spoke out loud, which I thought meant I was channeling my guides. Then I realized I was not connected and reached higher to connect to my guides.
That was a spirit, one on Earth. We don't know if that was a good spirit or not. It was trying to be funny.
I was annoyed. Well it wasn't funny! I needed to know!
A couple minutes later, I started thinking about it and laughing quite a bit. The spirit had been watching, and it noticed how my guides had a very specific procedure for what I should and shouldn't do, so it was making fun of all the weird things I was and wasn't allowed to do.
Come back, yogurt spirit!
I crossed it over.
Later on, I was walking down the hall. “She's a bitch, you know. You should take a knife and stab her through the heart!” a spirit said to me.
Away!
Go like this. There is a little wisp in your aura on the back of your neck. Fling it around and get them off you! They are draining your energy!
I found it, and spun the whisp around. It was tricky.
Here, we have a bible passage for you. Jude 1:16. Look it up.
I did so:
These are murmurers, complainers, walking after their own lusts, and their mouth speaketh great swelling words, having men's persons in admiration because of their advantage.
These are the souls that gather around you.
As I was sitting, I started talking to my guides again.
“Here is what you are going to do now. Your parents are not happy with you. You are going to go and find them a gift tomorrow, and it's going to smooth things over. No, I'm not your guides, I'm a spirit.”
I spoke this aloud. It hijacked the line just like the last one did. I crossed that one over.
After I did so, a couple hours later, it came back to me and thanked me for crossing him over. It was an intelligent spirit. The intelligent spirits do original things. My guides and I decided that spirits now had to earn being crossed over, by proving that they were intelligent in some way.
A couple days later, we were eating dinner out at a restaurant. I was sitting in silence while my parents conversed. I heard a whisper in my ear. “Scream!” The ghost spoke with a sick longing, like it brought him perverted sexual pleasure to hear women scream out of fright. I imagined a human ghost relationship, one of a sexual nature where the ghost lusts after a human's scream. The fright, the terror, the passion.
I sat for a second, thinking about this relationship. Then I remembered I had a ghost to cross over. Come here. Look up. Go into the light!
Time for a Red Bull! To the Quickee Mart! My guides informed me one morning.
As I walked, I talked to the spirit guides about Matthew. They said he was a great guy, but he has problems with his mind. He has a mental illness. His incessant lying, it was not something that would go away easily. It was a chronic problem, that would not go away unless he made a subconscious decision to always tell the truth, which was unlikely. Very unlikely.
We kept walking. They told me about me and my cocaine brain. That incessant embarrassment, getting humiliated over every little thing, it was a result of the longterm Adderall usage. It would manifest itself in other ways, too. After awhile, and it's already starting... You start to become critical of other people as well, and think everything they say is embarrassing or stupid. It is an obnoxious problem because you don't really think so, but you react like you think so.
I sat at Mac's Deli, sipping a Red Bull. My guides spoke to me again. You have a bit more money. You need a stick of beef jerky, too. It has something in it that will help your intestines.
I walked over and bought a stick of beef jerky. As I ate, the Wax Goblin spoke to me.
“I want you off your meds so we can be friends. I love it when you talk to me in your sleep.”
“Wax Goblin... Wax Goblin... Wax Goblin...” I felt the Wax Goblin helping my intestines.
I enjoyed the Wax Goblin very, very much. It was a great goblin. On the way to the restroom, a spirit spoke to me. “I am the wax goblin. You and I are too heavily involved. I think we should just be friends.”
That's an intelligent spirit. Cross that one over.
I did so.
After that, a slew of spirits kept impersonating the Wax Goblin. I didn't cross any of them over. They were just trying to copy the first spirit's original idea.
As I walked home, I got out a piece of nicotine gum. I had cut a bunch in half. As I held the package between my fingers, I felt one start to slip out. I squeezed my fingers and caught it. As I was doing so, I got a funny feeling. A feeling of what it would be like to be trying to hold onto something, but the harder you try, the more you lose your grip, and it eventually slips away. I asked my guides if there was something like this in their world that I was reminded of.
Yes. That's the feeling you get of losing ties with loved ones. We are all connected by cords. When you start to lose contact, you try to hold onto it, but it eventually slips away, the harder you try.
I kept walking. As I approached the house, the Hobgoblin called out to me.
“Okay. You are approaching your house now. Your parents are in a good mood. It would be good if you cleaned up the kitchen a bit, and swept the rug, and made fun of them a little bit but... Hey, they'd like that too much! Ha! Just do whatever, it doesn't matter. Eat a banana, drink a glass a milk, and return to your room for more channeling.”
What the hell? The Hobgoblin is advising me now?”
Yeah, we don't know if that was really “the Hobgoblin” or not, but... One thing you should know is that goblins always have consciousness.
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