Bacon: Did it eat you, or are you done with your mind work today?

What is this idea you speak of? Wizards? Hogwash! Wizards exist only in fiction! But what if they did not? Would you know a wizard from a muggle? Or would the muggle pretend to be a wizard, and catch your ear socket? Please, I know wizards.

When you enjoy wizards, you pretend you don't exist in this present moment. When wizards enter your heart, you believe little about the present, and instead, exist with the wizards. When wizards become like you, you lose touch with reality, and bring hope to the human race.

When wizards eat bacon, they do not exist in this present moment. They think, oh, this bacon tastes good, wow, where did this come from? Now, muggle s. Damn autocorrect. When muggle s eat wizard food, they bring hope to the human race. What is wizard food? Rice crackers. That's what wizards eat from time to time, to create spells of ricey atmosphere in their minds. Which is conducive to spell work.

When you eat rice crackers, you do exist in the present moment, because they taste so bad. When normal people eat bacon, they do not like to think that they exist in the present moment, because it tastes so good. When normal people eat bacon, they think it tastes like heaven. But for some, they think it is good at stopping their minds from hell. Because bacon creates havoc for the minds mad center, and instead, makes them love words.

Instead of helping yourself to some more bacon, eat rice crackers. They love to be eaten by friends of the wizarding community. When you eat rice crackers, they will create mind food for the brain to eat fondly, and create nice neurotransmitters that help your body do its magic. Sometimes, when wizards eat bacon, they forget to stop chewing, because they forget what they are doing. This is because wizards enjoy bacon on a whole different level. When bacon is consumed by bacon lovers, they enjoy it so much, they eat it too often and the dopamine becomes resistant to the dopamine receptors. When you eat bacon, chew very softly, swallow completely, and forget where you are. This is bacon, not Hogwarts.