Near Delusional Ramblings on God and Humans

So I'm sitting here after class thinking some more. I'm asking myself, what makes me think the alternative to God is nothing? Maybe it is everything. Maybe all things exist at all time, every single possibility imaginable and even those unimaginable. It exists outside of time so it is funny that I referenced time. That means that in one of these universes God must exist, because I can imagine God. And it's funny because just yesterday my dad and I were talking about how Descartes made this argument and about how it was a weak argument. But it only works if everything exists. And it doesn't mean that God exists in this universe, maybe a parallel universe. I don't know.

Okay, so here's what I'm thinking now. Everything that exists is thought. The great mind of God thought everything into existence. At the core of humanity is awareness, or God, or me. And when I say me I mean, the feeling I associate with myself. That's what I think of when I think of the beginning of existence. I think of myself.

If I were to explain further this theory on thought I would just be spewing unoriginal ideas that I read from a book, in particular "Manifesting Change."

There is nothing more powerful than my soul. But since I am also human, I am in a weakened state.

Which reminds me of something else my dad and I were talking about. I mentioned that the human soul desires connection and bonding and unity. I also mentioned that this urge could be seen as evolutionary, as we evolved this way because people who stuck together tended to survive. But I told my dad that the desire to connect was a spiritual soul urge and not an evolutionary human urge, I mean in a way it's both because they fit together, but the origin is spiritual. I said something like that. My dad said it was kind of silly.

It works like this: we are souls first. But once we become human, we are humans first, souls second. But it depends on the person which one they place first. I place soul first, but then I break down and place human first.

And now I'm thinking, I could argue that we crave spirituality because we have that soul urge for more than the human world. But I know evolutionary people would argue with me. Some would say that it is just a way to deal with the realization that we are mortal. But that's not all it is for me. It's a hell of a lot more than that to me.

 What the human desires is survival. So why does it desire spirituality? I can answer that, what human desires isn't actually survival! It's pleasure and comfort!

Maybe the desire for spirituality all comes down to the desire to have your mind blown, because it's pleasurable.