What's this?

I like to look around for things in my mind and find new things and think about them. That's something I enjoy in life. An old issue from over a year ago, and there may have been thought security breaches by Jason at the time but this hasn't actually... Been thought of as significant although I point at Jason here, huh, did that effect anything? Probably not though. Anyway... There was this thing where Kristen was talking about... Don't make assumptions about thought format, it wasn't Kristen's voice talking. Umm... In a weird way about a car outside by a psychiatrist office? Just a little psychiatrist office, or it could be a dentist or a eye doctor as well, but I say psychiatrist, could be any of those. I also think of fourth grade here, maybe a dentist appointment but that's probably random garble de gook reference that didn't need to be referenced. I don't know. And... something about looking through a window, or something clear, or the old house with my parents, the sky light, all sorts of things get thrown in but it isn't as chaotic as you are thinking. I'm just looking at this in my mind because it is weird, and sometimes, like hey, remember the "ascension key?" What is this... Oh that's SOMETHING, leave it alone (guides say). You wouldn't remember the ascension key that's something in Burn Like Jesus that isn't that important, just something. Anyway, what's the point? To the point more, it's Kristen talking about a mythical car sitting in a parking lot by a tree. A very small parking lot. IN THE SAME.... (this is the part that's important HERE), way she might talk about the light at the end of the tunnel that you walk through when you die. That. Also, everyone said please talk down Kristen's ego. Get over the fact you have a pretty face Kristen. It isn't pretty the way you make it up either, with makeup. Everyone told me, ego detriment Kristen. Also, you and Jason aren't as different reputation-wise on the other side, no. Not right now though... No not true, but... You are smarter than people think NOW, you're also known for being a fucking bitch Jason says, it's something, then he says... "GOD I didn't want to tell her that." So, to sum it up... "Kristen, you're not that pretty and you're not that smart. I'm glad we had this talk."

Gratitude

I think a lot on gratitude. What am I grateful for the most? Belief in God. Things like hyped up emotional energy at the same time. I get down a lot, without people to talk to in person. Seems like a helpful, dopamine-filled exercise, but I don't get it a whole lot with anyone special. Or with friends. I enjoy my hyped up emotional energy and lack of sickness the most. No sickness, ever. A little runny nose sometimes, could be allergies too. Nothing annoying. Yeah, but the passing cars might think... Nah, not sick. I remember the time I got sick in 2016 in the summer. That was the last time I was sick, before that it was in 2008. I remembered because I forgot, wow weird summer, but that was dreadful, hot, sick, yucky feeling. Nothing is worse than body problems and sickness. All these things make me think of death but do be careful, sick people don't want to be reminded of death. Don't let me get sick, please. I won't. The emotional energy! The emotional hyped up energy of your life is so high! You know, like in spirit sex, on the pain scale, it isn't THAT low compared to the pain scale of Earth to do a "Forbidden Sex Act," However, it's about the enjoyment level drop! If it goes down all of a sudden, it's worse. It's kind of like calculus or math, see. That's why I am grateful and others are like hey Rachel we thought you were having fun but Jason just died and stuff and I don't like that he tortured me but there was so much else going on at the same time. If I do something weird in my own mind like think of a duck, will you get mad? Sometimes thinking of strange things makes me feel happy and listening to different music makes me happy that sounds different. And they get mad anyway, but maybe they aren't. What did I do? But everyone looks to me anyway. Despite all the weirdness. Rachel, you got it all! You got a montage of beautiful original art, a coffee pot, a nice neat room that is fun, Jesus in the corner, spirit guides, and makeup, perfume, a nice figure and face (I think?), gym memberships, a nice place to live, food, a restroom, free hygiene products, some money, and fame that doesn't slap you in the face yet. That's why I'm happy. Also, I think I am a pretty good person inside too and that's what makes me happiest the most. Sometimes I feel empty though. And I have music to fill the void. And I try, too. To make myself better. But I always forget that Jesus is coming. How? Huh? How weird!

Zuhl Family Points of Interest, "Culture"

A more poignant point of interest to the Zuhl Family than Eminem at all might come down to the day Rachel woke up in a stupor from a ridiculously stressful dream. She came down, sat at the dinner table and said, "I had a dream that my iPhone disappeared. There was a message on the computer that said, if this trick right here doesn't work to get your iPhone back, you must be in an alternate universe!" I tried it and it didn't work. The thing about this situation, to me it wasn't a dream, I stated it out loud as if this situation actually really happened to me. Kristen said, "Huh?" And I responded like, "What the fuck Kristen? I just told you what fucking happened. My iPhone disappeared and my computer will not give it back to me." Kristen said "Huh?" And Ian responded with a shush. I understood later, I was still not awake when I came down and explained that situation at the dinner table. I was still in a sleep-like stupor, that dream was so stress filled to me you had no idea. "The dream meant I was in an alternate universe!" Yeah, well, then the iPhone disappeared in August 2022, which lead to the Black Power Brigade and immediately after I achieved Warp Speed. The issues, the problems, flew at me so fast right there and I was astounded at how well I handled every single one of them. With incredible grace and precision. And you know, I didn't think the "Black Power Brigade" was THAT funny of a joke, okay. Seriously, no I did not. There is something serious about that joke I understood, but damn, I was so impressed at how I had already "William Vandergaw Tricked" that guy and damn the spiritual possession I suspected over the infamous "William Vandergaw Incident" actually came back, and was thrown in my face as something very positive. A personal best. Man, I could not get over how impressed with myself I was. And yes, it made sense, my iPhone disappeared right there, yes an alternative universe, and yes I reached warp speed. A lot of stuff happened right after. Don't get overwhelmed thinking Jason or any friend I have at all right now is so fucking important to me, I was more impressed that the mission was real. Well, the Jason situation went somewhere. Good. That could potentially, and I would have to ask, might be more important to anyone I know than anything Eminem has ever said or done. First it was Dr. Dre in my bed, assuring me Eminem does not understand because he was white. And then Debbie Mathers. Yeah, I don't hate your mother either, Eminem. Some people in my life might be more concerned that I will stop eating altogether, than that I will get fat. I point to that issue. "Yep. Wow, so true." And for the record, Eminem, I have way more social influence in the world than you have. Haha, suck yourself and realize you don't know me this is Eastern Culture. That is all.

Alarm C Issue of the Hour Which Inadvertently Demands Alarm C

I went through Innercept, holding close to the possibility that my memoir would make it big. It ended with a suicide attempt at first that would normally make it unpublishable. I had to deal with that situation and hold on to the God darsh fucking memoir the entire time I was at Innercept to avoid a sort of depression that crushed my soul to death. I held on, despite everything, the memoir would make it because that story was just so fucking weird and I thought that that story was just so fucking weird and it was also true. I eventually recovered, got back home, redeemed the content of Party Like Jesus by making it end differently. I let people read it, got no real feedback whatsoever. "Only interesting to people who know you." "Well-written." Means topic that is boring, keep trudging, Joey Jazz herself explained to me we just don't believe such a weird story. When the karmic debt with Matthew indicates go ahead Rachel, I publish the memoir. I receive no money for the memoir. None. "Well we think you gamble," a woman at Plaid Pantry indicates somehow. I would never gamble ever and that is a fact of mine that remains true no matter what. I have absolutely no interest in gambling and have never tried it even once. And then... Well some douchebag celebrated your favorite holiday November 19th this year. Are you happy Rachel? Are you happy Rachel? Shut up that's not my problem is all I have to say. Shut up. And I know what I am doing here.