After Lonely Journey, Reunited

So I sleep a lot. Sleep debt or no sleep debt, the brain needs to rekindle love affair with the ground. After two months of purposeful sleep deprivation, I sleep all the time.

My dreams involve a journey. I was informed that there were people watching me from a distance by my beloved spirit friends. After awhile, I turn and see the outline of about five different people standing in the shrubbery of a house very close to my house down the way. At the same time, we are standing on the asphalt of my old elementary school in a completely different neighborhood miles and miles and miles away.

The journey was long and lonely. Beautiful and exquisite, and I have finally reached enlightenment.

I had a dream right after my second episode, around the time I was first sent off to treatment. I was somewhere, and I was taken on a beautiful journey all alone. It was beautiful but scary being so separated from everyone else, whatever friends I may have had and whatever acquaintances who may have temporarily kept me company. It was like journeying off into a painting.

I told my mother about this dream.  She said, "It's alcohol!" No. "Yes it is it's alcohol!" No I don't think so. "YES IT IS IT'S ALCOHOL! Very beautiful and lonely? Rachel, that's a dream about alcohol!"

I wonder in what universe my mother lived. I usually am not alone when drinking, and I would not describe the process as beautiful. Obnoxious compared to the spiritual journey of 2017. But yes, alcohol was consumed on the journey.

The last part of the journey involved journeying into a painting. No one wants to live their life in a painting.

Anyway, in the dream I just had an hour or so ago, the five people came up to me and finally introduced themselves. There were five people I did not know in real life.

There was a reference the a girl in my math class in 7th grade with whom I have never spoken.

And now I am awake. I recently admitted myself into the hospital to wrap up enlightenment and move above and beyond and journey on into the great unknown.

I have no friends who are alive and living.