Spiritual Musings on a Chemical World

Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Coconut Water

Why do I drink coconut water? It is not for the delusional health benefits. It is not for the delusional taste beauty. It is because it helps my body feel better.

Another thing. My body works much better on coconut water. Milk has the same nutrient, but in much smaller, minuscular quantities. So, to get the same benefits as one glass coco water, I have to drink three to six glasses of milk, depending. This adds up to hormonal imbalances, because of the milk hormones, and added extra poundage! What? You still care about that Rachel? Yeah, Beev, I care about my weight. The reason I told you, "Don't worry about it..." when I was eating food, and you told me to watch my weight, was because I was famished beyond recognition!! FAMISHED, BEEV, FAMISHED!!! I needed calories stat!! I know you don't think it is possible for a body to need that much fuel, but when you're me... it happens. Let's just leave it at that.

Another thing about my food intake. They are not delusional nutritional necessities. If I don't eat watermelon, radishes, cranberry juice, beef, zucchini, arugula, romaine lettuce, bananas.... I get really down and low in energy!! I need the nutritional benefits of these foods!! I know you think, oh, food is just for energy... But I need it for other reasons too!! So don't tell me, Oh Rachel, you could just eat some of this french fries and ice cream and you will feel just fine... No one really understands why we need to eat well, it just makes us better people for no reason at all... HORSE SHIT, BEEV!! HORSE SHIT!!!

One more thing. I need more vitamins. Not C, I get too much of that!! WOAH!!! C OVERLOAD!!! Another one I need, B vitamins!!! YES!!! Another one I need. Magnesium!!! I AM VERY DEFICIENT RIGHT NOW RACHEL!!!! Another thing I need, something found in cherries!!! That is all.

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