So I am just fucking going crazy here. For awhile I felt this strong sense of caring about everyone and how my actions affected everyone. Now I just feel like I could punch everyone in the face.
I just want to get the fuck away from this Innercept nightmare. I want to get it the fuck out of my life. I don't want anything to do with Innercept. I don't want to be here. I want out.
When the fuck did the meds I was given every help anything? Name one time I took the medication and as a result I got better, or my thinking got clearer, or something. It has never happened. Not once. The meds just fuck me up. I don't give a flying fuck I don't want to pretend they help when they don't. If you think they are helping it's like the same thing as the placebo effect. You want them to help so it affects your perception.
Despite everything I still trust my instincts. If you want me to stop, you should probably give me some drugs which put me in a coma. Or just kill me.
And leave Erik out of this. Erik has nothing to do with anything. It's me.
This life is killing me. I hate it. I hate it so much.
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