Sometimes I think I must be immature for the way I resent my parents. If I were more mature, I would recognize that them sacrificing so much money to send me to Innercept was something they did with good intentions. Instead, what I hear them say is, "we are spending all our money to put you in prison because we really love you and you're worth it, Rachel."
What they don't realize is that when they do such things, it puts distance between myself and them. It makes their words have less weight and mean less to me. It lessens their psychological influence over me.
One thing I do appreciate though. That is the fact that my parents recognize that I will do what I will do and they can't change that. That when it comes down to it, the decisions in my life are up to me to make.
I also find it very annoying that there is no such thing as confidentiality in therapy at Innercept. Anything you say in session can be repeated to your parents. Anything, even something harmless.
What my parents need to know is that I will always do what is right for me at the time. Any mistakes I make always ultimately lead to growth. And I will always move in the direction of bettering myself. I have been in some dark places but gotten out of them by myself. My parents talk about how well I am doing. I am the reason I am doing that way today, it doesn't have a damn thing to do with Innercept.
And I am sorry that my mom thinks so little of me.
No comments:
Post a Comment