Success! Success! Success!
After a long and harrowing year and a half without Adderall, the slow process of recovering missing dopamine has been completed! There is now enough dopamine all over the mental space in Rachel's brain to prevent dark spots all together! THERE ARE NO MORE DARK SPOTS AT ALL! Read 'em and weep, no more dark spots! We are recovering biochemically from years of Adderall abuse!
After awhile you start to wonder, is it worth staying off? You wonder, now that my brain is back to normal, why don't we do it all again? Everyone stares at you with anticipation. Who are you to stop going back on Adderall and having fun again? And if you like Adderall, why don't you try cocaine too?
I know the reasons why they say this, and I like to pretend I like a few of them, but I don't. We know the reasons, here in the Rachel Zuhl Experience, why we are clean and sober from all drugs except acceptable legal drugs barring pot. NO POT EITHER! We are clean, here in the Rachel Zuhl Experience. We like being clean. It's something we decided to do to keep rampant bad moods and biochemical reactions from destroying out sanity.
In the mean time, we marvel at the effect sobriety has had on our brain! We think of the self-confidence boost, and the belief that we can be happy naturally, without the aid of artificial stimulants that boost neurotransmitters temporarily. Other than that, we enjoy listening to the banter inside our minds when it is fueled with passion, not something like fun.
In the mind of Rachel Zuhl, there is a new structure that comes from enhanced awareness and thoughtfulness due to sobriety long term. It means we are better now than we were before, having conquered a very strong addiction and come out on top! We are the strongest thing in the room! Look around, Rachel! See that vase right there? We are stronger than that! Now throw it! See how easily it breaks! That is the symbolic representation of your parents.
This dream continues to reoccur.
