My Christian Enlightenment

So I had an enlightenment a month or so ago.

One thing you should know about my enlightenment is that I just tagged on some shit to it about all religions being correct to sound more politically correct.

So I used to think that Christians were kind of stupid. Now I actually think that Christians are way smarter than atheists. Actually it's not a matter of one being smarter than the other.

I didn't understand the idea of getting saved. The thing is, it's not really supposed to make sense to us because we're not God. That's the thing about Christianity, or this brand of Christianity I subscribe to. Part of it is accepting that you don't know fucking everything.

Which is something that atheists refuse to do. They think that they are capable of comprehending the universe. They can't accept that the universe follows a logic that they are incapable of comprehending.

Except that when I reached enlightenment, I did comprehend it. And I remembered how, the only way to get around the hell problem, is to have people accept Jesus.

You realize that God IS NOT all powerful. I don't believe in an all powerful God. My dad told me that I wasn't allowed to believe this. That if I believed in God, He had to be all powerful.

But I don't believe in an all-powerful God. My God can't do something like, say, create a rock so big He Himself cannot lift it. My God can't do that! Well, that doesn't logically make any sense! Yeah, because my God cannot do everything. He can't do things that don't logically make any sense. And saving someone who has not accepted Jesus, or bringing someone back from hell, are things that don't logically make sense to God. Because God follows a higher logic.

People think the idea of hell is funny. You realize, once you have properly had the shit scared out of you, that hell is the scariest concept there is. There is nothing fucking scarier than hell. It's this state of horrible horrible agony that goes on for eternity and never gets any better.

Non-Christians get annoyed by Christians trying to convert them. One thing I have learned is, Christians really aren't trying to be mean when they try to convert you. They aren't trying to be intolerant of your belief system. They seriously just want to save you from the fucking most horrible scariest shit ever.

You realize that God hasn't talked for 2000 years. That's not very long for God. The way humans think is different from the way God thinks. You also realize that there is no way in fucking hell the bible is inerrant. You know why? Because language is so fucking shaky and unreliable. Like, today, people don't even agree amongst themselves what words mean. Think about being translated between languages, and several times into modern-day English. They keep translating the bible because the English language keeps changing. There is no fucking way the bible means exactly the same thing now as it did back when it was written.

So these are my ramblings for today.

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Jesus and the Crazy Decision Strings

Yeah, Jesus was perfect, he doesn't have FREE WILL.

The way free will works, it is like a gigantic game of tug-of-war. One decision you make, changes someone else's decision. All our decisions are interconnected by strings.

God doesn't know all decisions that are going to be made beforehand. It's just that one Jesus comes, all the strings come together. Jesus is the place where all the strings come together. That's why Jesus knows things about what people are going to do.

When Jesus came, it was a mistake, because people were so in awe of how great he was, they missed his message.

Weird Dream

So I had this dream last night. I was in this group of something, like girl scouts only I think it was different people. I was chosen to be the official hot girl. I had to wear a special dress, and when we went places it was my duty to smile and wave at everyone.

Then, this person was telling me that it's a problem how I always change the subject when issues were brought up. As they said this, I was looking at something on the ground. It was this little human-shaped thing, and as I watched it divided like a cell into two human-shaped things. "What's that?" I said, changing the subject.

It turned out to be this deadly thing that would keep dividing and dividing and multiplying and the population would keep growing and growing. As it did this, it would kill everyone. At first we thought it was harmless, and funny, and I was the one who let it outside, with my appointed husband. We were on a TV show, and since I was the hot girl that meant I was also the dumb girl. If I hadn't done that, it wouldn't have killed everyone. So it kept dividing and multiplying and at one point my character had to die. But then I was suddenly this different girl, either that or my character came back to life, and it was just me and this guy in this closet. Outside, it was all little human things. Me and this guy in the closet were the only people left. So we set off some sort of blast outside, wiping out the little multiplying human things. The end.

Good dreams.

Schrodinger's Cat and the Law of Attraction

So I figured out the universe. One of the things about the universe is that reality isn't fixed, and reality is not the same for everyone. Truth is not the same for everyone.

So in my world, you need to accept Jesus as your savior to avoid hell. And in my world, this is a fundamental fact of the universe that everyone needs to do this. At the same time, if your reality is different then mine, and you don't do this, you won't go to hell. Because that's not true for you.

Except, that in my world, everyone needs to do this. But this is just my world. Not your world.

In my world, my copy of you will be in hell after you die if you don't. But that's just my copy of you and that's not really you.

We all exist in our own realities, and our realities interact with each other. So if you know me, my reality touches your reality. But the laws your reality are defined by aren't the same as the laws my reality are defined by.

So, the reason the law of attraction works. I only experience my own consciousness and life, not yours. When I don't know what's going on in other peoples' lives, that opens up infinite possibilities of what it could be. It's like Schrodinger's cat, when you don't know, you haven't manifested a reality yet so the possibilities are open. So in my world, and infinite amount of things could be happening in your life. So when you decide one day, to tell me about something in your life, or something in your life somehow collides with my life, a reality is manifested. So before the reality is manifested, you could be doing any number of things in your life, and in my reality, all those possibilites are true simultaneously. But then, the day I find your needles for shooting up, the reality is then manifested that all this time you were shooting up on heroine. So that becomes true in my reality.

So if you focus on a particular outcome, that will make that particular outcome more likely to manifest.

Free Will and the God Connection

So I wanted to talk some on free will. I used to like this page on facebook called The Flower of Life and Sacred Geometry. The reason I liked this page was because I liked the flower of life and sacred geometry. But then the page would post a bunch of crap and I unliked it because the stuff they posted was pissing me off.

So, one of the things they posted was about free will. What it said was, free will is just an illusion, because someone will always decide to do what they think will bring them the greatest amount of pleasure.

This partially true, partially false. It is true that you will only make decisions based on what will bring you the greatest amount of pleasure. That is, decisions regarding actions. But that's not where free will lies. Free will lies in the organization of the mind. So basically, to simplify what I am thinking, you choose what you think, how you think, and what outcome will bring you the most perceived pleasure is based on the way your mind is organized. The way that you chose to organize your mind.

So let's talk about choices and actions. When you make choices, you choose between two different things at a time. You break down each decision into a yes/no question. And then you answer a series of yes/no questions to arrive at your decision.

So say you were deciding between buying the shirt in red, blue, or yellow. First you would think, "Do I like the idea of owning this shirt in red?" And if the answer is yes, you would then ask, "Even though I like it in red, would I prefer it in blue?" If the answer is yes, then you would ask, "Would I like it even better in yellow than blue?"

You organize your mind. All action comes from God. God makes you do things.

Dopamine is what motivates your brain to act. Dopamine is also the pleasure brain chemical. Because it is pleasure that drives you to act. And all feelings of pleasure, on a spiritual level, come from God. So when you have more dopamine you have a stronger connection with God. I mean, in a certain sense. That doesn't mean that God loves you more. But what pleasure is on a spiritual level is connection with God.

So, what I was saying was, you think, God acts for you. Because God is what makes things happen on the physical plane.

I shall revisit this topic later.

Where the Yin Meets the Yang: Why God is Probably a Girl

So I am taking a short break from studying mobile app development to write this blog on something I was thinking yesterday.

Human's existence on Earth, the speck of human consciousness, is the place where the logical meets the  emotional. It all occurs inside the human mind.

The physical is the logical, the masculine, the yang. It is concerned with things that are concrete, things that are measurable, calculable, things that you can apply logic to.

The spiritual is the emotional, the feminine, the yin. It is concerned with experiences, how we experience things, experiences we understand but cannot put words to, or apply logic to.

It's like how you can't describe color to a blind man. Because the experience of colors is something there are no words to describe.

A little kid, or anyone for that matter, could go on asking "Why?" forever. There comes a point where you just have to say, "It is because... it is." Some things... just are. You can't describe them. You can't put logic to them.

The yang are the questions one asks. The yin is the things that just are, that you can't put words to or apply reason to.

And from this, we can deduce that God is probably a girl. Not that God has a vagina, because God doesn't have a body, but God is part of the feminine, or the yin. Because to me, God is the point where you stop applying reason. At least, in terms of how it came to be. God is the essence of the universe. God always was. God always will be. God just is. The essence of the universe is spiritual.

People make the mistake of not recognizing that their brain capacity is limited. In particular, atheists like Richard Dawkins. I read a quote by him that he dislikes religion because it makes you satisfied with not understanding.

You have to realize, that the nature of the universe, why everything came to be, is something that is impossible to understand fully. You can understand it better, but you can't understand it fully. Because when humans seek to understand something, they do this by attempting to apply logic to it. And some things just do not follow the rules of logic.

So you have to be satisfied with not understanding. You have to be the little kid who stops asking "Why?" Not that you should never ask why, but you also need to accept that certain things just are.

You see the conflict between the yin and the yang come into play when it comes to religion. Religion is an attempt to apply logic to the yin, or the spiritual. The truth is, logic and reason are native to the physical. That is why religions seem contradictory. They are contradictory if you use logic. In terms of metaphysics, they are different takes on the same thing.

So now what I am doing is, I am wondering if my experiences with hell really represented truth, or rather they just represented a step along the journey. The journey being my changing beliefs.